Delightfully Useless

Okay, so various people on my flist have been applying the Pirate Translator to their fanfic in honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day. It's actually tomorrow here by now, but... eh, why not.

The pirate-ized version of One More Time is under the cut.



"But, Doctor, this be your last life. Ye "Ahoy, Me Hearties! " can't g't yourself killed now!"

Th' thirteenth Doctor smiled down at his companion - his best matey, feisty as e'er - Sarah Jane Smith. "Who says it's me last life?"

"But..." Sarah fumbled fer words. "But ye told me yourself. Twelve "Belay that!" regenerations, thirt'n lives. Teeth "Nancy-Pants!" an' Curls be number four, Rooster-hair wi' th' sneakers be number ten, an' you've regenerated three times since him. Thirt'n lives."

Th' face might change, but that grin ne'er did. "Ah, but that's nay quite accurate. I "Thar Be Devil T' Pay!" referred t' each o' me blunderingly different appearances as a different regeneration, fer convenience's sake, but I do actually have one more com'n."

"You mean ye once changed your appearance without regenerating?" Sarah silently ran through th' changes o' face she knew bout an' th' reason fer each one. They'd "Skullduggery!" all b'n fatal.

"Exactly. When "Heave Ho!" th' Time Lords captured me dur'n me second life, they didn't actually execute me b'fore exil'n me. I "Yo-HO, me hearties!" suppose they felt it be too barbaric."

"Then... But I've s'n pictures o' ye. Him. "Ye Landlubber!" Th' second ye. A little black-haired fellow wi' a face like a basset puppy, unseaworthily right? An' th' way he dressed – he be th' exact opposite o' me first Doctor."

"Yes. In "Blow Me Down!" ere way, th' exact opposite."

Th' Doctor obviously thought that be tremendously significant, but Sarah couldn't figure out why. "So what did they do t' ye, if they didn't... regenerate you?" she demanded. "Well, actually..." Th' Doctor rubbed th' astern o' his neck sheepishly. "To be honest, they - salt-blastedly well..."

"They what?" Sarah prompted.

"They reversed me polarity."

I'm also testing out LJ crossposting here. (I do find it vastly amusing that in fleeing crossposting from LJ we have all wound up crossposting to it. *g*)